I wear pink in my scars and love in my heart

My heart is full after last night’s event.   My people surrounded me with a lot of love in a lot of ways.  It is easier for me to pretend that we’re all there for “a good cause”, but the reality is that my people showed up for me… it’s personal and I feel very loved by the way that my people stand in solidarity.  Everyone who engages in events like this sacrifices something for the betterment of another: time, money, energy, etc.  The folks who aren’t directly impacted by breast cancer and who show up to these things–those folks are my heroes, even more so than the “survivors” because they are choosing to stand with a hurting community by choice.  I have so many selfless friends and family.  Thanks for the thoughts, prayers, walks, donations, high-fives, and cheers; you make me feel loved and worthy of the mission: Do Today Well.

Going to breast cancer events is emotion-packed for me.  I wear pink in my scars, my prognosis, my physical energy level; I don’t need to actually wear pink to know that my life is intimately tied to it.  Seeing the “in memory of” signs is wrenching, but I make myself read them and see them — really see them — because that is part of this story too.  My mind goes to my friends who have died.  There is a bluntness and an unfair brevity there that hurts; the worst truth is that my feelings are tiny in comparison to those of their friends and family who miss them minute-by-minute and are doing life without them.  It’s hard; there is no way around that truth.  However, I know all I can do is Do Today Well, for me and for them.

There were a lot of great moments for me, but my favorite was probably kneeling before the paparazzi of my friends’ cameras after the race as all the kids who walked with us gathered around me for a picture.  We’re raising the next generation of givers; not only do I have the love and support I need as I navigate my hardships, but I see the community that Maren and Greta have forming around them also.  I carry the diagnosis, but this is my family’s story as much as it is mine.  I love that our support and love is deep and high and far and wide.

Thank you.